Be you...wonderful, beautiful YOU

Welcome back- I hope that this day finds you well.  I am sure that you all like me have some days that are better than others.  Do you ever stop to think about why?  There is the obvious that we sometimes feel better than others, things go our way more some days than others and so forth.  

Authenticity

There is more to it than that though.  I find days when I am able to show up and be authentic, be me and be real it is a better day. “Authenticity is actually a collection of choices, choices that we make every day. It's the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen” by Brene' Brown.  Those days when I am not overwhelmed by the thoughts and feelings that I have to do and be more than I am, I feel better, I am better.  These feelings of not enough and needing to do more are generally self-imposed by many of us. 

Can you relate to that?  

We all do so much, we push to achieve, search for more and go after more.  Most days I am all about more and want to do and be more.  However there some days it feels like it is too much.  Those are days that I wonder why I push myself to go and search and create more when I am already enough.  You are already enough.  I believe as the previous article says we already have it all.  I know wholeheartedly that what you need is already there within you and that all you have to do is learn how to access it.   Do you ever feel that urgency to do too much?  I do, it is a struggle for me to keep the balance between achieving and succeeding and pushing for too much.  It is this, this need to take on everything and prove I can do it all at times that led me to reach out for a  solution, a something to help calm the monkey’s that jump around in my head that led me to yoga and mindfulness and meditation.  The relief and calmness that these practices can give me when I practice them now leads me to want to spread the practice.  If these practices can help the monkeys pouncing in my brain and in my head pass out then they can help you too.  This is why my mission is to share these ideas and if I can teach a few people and they teach a few people and so forth…we spread the wealth in so many ways.

Climb off the hamster wheel

Do you every feel like a hamster on a wheel running and running and never getting anywhere?  Mindfulness can help you down off the wheel.  The ability to learn to observe, without judging what is then you obtain the power of slowing down and learning slowly to just be and that you are enough.   We do not have to react to everything that happens. We do not have to get involved in stories that are not our own.  We do not have to be superman or wonder woman.  We just have to be ourselves and in fact that is the only thing we can be.  We owe it to ourselves to be the best version of us and to realize that some days the best version of us is tired and that is perfectly acceptable.  We can learn to love our perfectly imperfect selves as we are.  I will leave you with a lyric from song by Pink “I'm learning to be brave in my beautiful mistakes”. I love that line and it is a truth in life I find that keeps me strong.

Take away tip - I invite you to listen to you, listen to the answer to the question that is already there within you.  Listen to how to be authentic and real and show up every day and honor who you are.  Embrace the perfect imperfect person you are and “learn to be brave in your beautiful mistakes”.

Creating a Sacred Container

Welcome- we came together last time to define mindfulness meditation as the beginning of our meditation journey.  We used the definiton from Jon Kabat-Zinn as being present, being aware without judging what is. I am working on creating a meditaion 101 course which will be a 6 or 8 week challenge online or in person for those who live close by and will keep you posted on that.

I stated last blog that we would discuss creating a sacred container.  What does that mean?  Simply put it means that when we come together or you come to practice by yourself that you take the time to perform a ritual of connectedness and acceptance. Whether I am leading group or guided meditaion or teaching midfulness I am going to start implementing something that I do for myself when I practice and that I am now ready to share with you all.  

I mentioned earlier that finding a place to be, to sit, to lay down- any place that is yours is an amazing introduction to a practice.  I get that we don't always have a room to ourself or a beautiful gazebo by the lake but we can find a place that we can make our own.  This can be a corner of a room, I love cozy corners, it could be a small area of your bedroom, perhaps a guest room or some space in the living or dining room.  Sometimes an area outside is good, a deck, a tree, a porch or any place that you feel safe.  We will discuss in another post how to find unusual ways and places to meditate which is what we have to do at times to get it in.  

If you are struggling to locate a sacred space I invite you to think back to a time when you felt loved and safe, content and happy.  Where were you?  What was around you?   Try to recall some of what the space looked like, colors or patterns, was it inside or outside.  Can you recall a specific odor or scent?  We often had a sacred space as a child that we used when we needed to be alone or were frightened or sometimes just needed an escape from a sibling.  Think about that, it may be very simple, I remember sitting on my steps in a home I grew up in.  I remember everything about the steps, the hall, the linen closet in the hall, the view of the front door etc.  For whatever reason I found safety and contentness sitting on the floor on those steps or in the hall.  

Once you have found your space try creating a ritual that you use everytime you come into sit or meditate or just be mindful.  In this space find some self awareness, use only self compassion.   I want this to be a ritual of connectedness and acceptance.  Create whatever works for you.  Light a candle, diffuse some oils, place a vase of fresh flowers on the table or ground.  Create positive affirmations for the space to hang up so that you read them when you step in. Start of a habit of removing your shoes to respect the space that you are creating.  When you find your ritual perform it everytime you step into your space, make a statement of gratitude for yourself and your ablity to be here and now and be present.

Take away tip- find and create your sacred space and ritual and share with me in the comments

love and light,

jamie

Mindful Meditation

Greetings my friend, I am so glad you are here.  We started talking a bit about a meditation challenge that will be coming up soon.  I will be guiding a challenge online FREE of charge this time only and plan to lead a face to face journey in my community.  For those of you not around here this entire journey can be taken from the comfort of your own home or office. Look for more to come on that later. 

I mentioned that I want us to explore some unique ways that I find to meditate at times.  As I said last time it is my truth that anywhere you are you can access an ability to be mindful and get in a few minutes of mindful meditation.  Then there are the different types of mediations that we will discuss as well.  

First, let's chat about last weeks take away tips.  Anyone try these?  I did, despite the fact that I have been practicing for a long time, it is still a practice and it helps me to go back to the basics at times.  It is all basics really because it is all about being present, being aware of your internal and external enviornment without judging it.  This week I used laundry as my mindful activity.  We all have dirty laundry, right?  I don't just love doing it and my guess is you don't either.  However, if we use mindfulness you  will find that everyday "chores" have more to offer than you think.  A few of the take aways from my mindful laundry include the following;  clean laundry smells so good, fresh and delighfully scented from the detergent, it is warm and a delight for your sense of touch fresh out of the dyer, taking the time to feel the materials, sort the piles and fold, hang and put away is really not all that bad.  In this participating in this activity guess what else happened?  I was present, alive and living in the moment.    If I had not used mindfulness then I would have lost moments of my life that I could never get back but I didn't just exist, I lived and what a joy.  Did you try the take away tips?  Please share your experiences and let me know what you think.

So some types of meditaion that we will be talking about are mindful meditation, mantra meditation, sound meditation, walking meditation, moving mediation and then a few of the things that I have made meditative in my own journey.  First and foremost to address is this...you can't do it wrong...period...no one has ever meditated wrong.  This is a non judgement allowed area.  You will not sit down and your mind and magically have your thoughts, worries, fears or everyday thoughts just go away.  That is ok, it is safe to say that no matter how long you meditate or study mindfulness and breathing practices your thoughts will NEVER just go away.  Nope, we just learn to become aware without judgment and without getting stuck. 

Let's chat mindful meditaiton this blog post or at least touch on it as it is an ever evolving practice.  You will find that the definition of mindfulness, meditation and such will become your own when you find your groove of the mindful living.  This is perfect, this is what I want.   However, for the sake of consistency in starting let's define mindfulness the way that Jon Kabat Zinn (MBSR) does 

It is the intention to pay attention to each and every moment of our life, non-judgmentally. While there are many possible definitions, the key aspects of any definition of mindfulness involve purposeful action, focused attention, grounded in the current experience, and held with a sense of curiosity. The Center for Mindfulness believes that we all have the capacity for mindfulness.  Please see link at the bottom of the page.

Let's look at that last line again.  The Center for Mindfulness believes that we all have the capacity for mindfulness. I believe this too, I beleve we can all do this and we can all benefit from it.  There is so much research to support this and more being done all the time.  This means, YES, YOU CAN DO IT.

What is mindful meditation?

mindfulness meditation,
a technique of meditation in which distracting thoughts and feelings are not ignored but are rather acknowledged and observed nonjudgmentally as they arise to create a detachment from them and gain insight and awareness.
Mosby's Medical Dictionary, 8th edition. © 2009, Elsevier.
 

A technique in which we simply sit with and observe our thoughts and feelings, we ackowledge them and send them on there way.  You are not your feelings or emotions, you are not your thoughts; these are all just a part of the experience.  You are the experience!  You have thoughts, emotions and feelings but they are NOT you.  If I had to choose a favorite part of mindfulness and mindful meditation is is the nonjudgment.  We will learn to detach from having to label things as good or bad and learn to just observe.  

Next blog we will talk creating your sacred space in which to meditate (and it can be found in so many different places).

Take away tip- Create your own definition inclusive of your thoughts and feelings about the above definition and talk to someone about mindfulness or mindful meditation.  Ask people what they know about it, ask if they are interested in learning more and if they are send them my way.  Let them know you are learing about it and they can too *

*This is, in part, a shameless way to start achieving my 2015 goal of spreading mindfuless everywhere.  What?  Did you think I could do that all myself?  No way, we have to do this together.  More soon and please leave me comments.

love and light,

Jamie

Not everything is good or bad, sometimes is just is

Mindfulness- what is it anyway?  It is a key phrase in mental health, yoga and other fields right now.  It is used in medical fields to manage chronic pain, it is used in mental health for depression, anxiety and other disorders, it is used in addiction and recovery, in other words it is every where but what is it?

That, my dear friend, depends on who you ask.  My definition is that mindfulness is being aware of what is going on in and around you and accepting it without labeling or judging it.  I also like Jon Kabat Zinn's definition "Mindfulness is paying attention in a particular way on purpose in the present moment, without judgement"  If you have not heard of him Jon Kabat-Zinn is a famous teacher of mindfulness meditation and the founder of the Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) at the University of Massachusetts where the program has been active for over 30 years.  It is a fabulous program that I am fortunate to have been able to complete and a goal of mine is to one day be a certified MBSR teacher.  That certification by its very nature of being mindful is a long journey and process that is a joy to be undergoing.

In life, most of us, live in the past or the future.  We spend amazing amounts of time analyzing the past.  We review in detail what we did or said, what we wish we had done or said, regretting actions or events or wishing we we had done something we didn't do.  When we aren't living in the past we are in the future.  We are planning, we are imagining often in great detail every possible outcome or event that we could encounter and often feel compelled to play out every possible ending and how we would react and feel if this or that happened.  Guess what?  It usually never happens in the way or ways we imagine it.  If by chance it does happen the way you imagined is it helpful or does it serve us in anyway to live the event more than the one time it actually occurs?  I say NO!  How often does this happen though?  We live and re live past and future events and when we do we put our bodies through the exact same physical reaction as if it is happening over and over and over.  Our bodies go into a stress reaction.  We jump to fight, flight or freeze reaction involuntarily and our heart rate increases, blood pressure increases, adrenaline gets going and all sorts of physical reactions that are needed IF our lives are in danger and we have a bear chasing us.  The reaction is not needed if the phone rings, we are late to a meeting or have an argument with a partner or friend yet this is what we have conditioned our bodies to do.  I always try to ask of myself and others around me "does that serve you in positive way" and if the answer is no then lets try to change it.  Most of the time the present moment, the right now is ok.  Most of the time right where you are and what you are doing is ok it is the fear of future or regret of past that creates depression  and anxiety.  If we practice and achieve being present in the here and now and being mindful, we are safe and can avoid many of the unneeded and unwanted emotions and fears we experience.  This is a touch on what mindfulness is and can do for you.  I look forward to sharing much more.  I want to give you something to try at home to begin putting this into action to living your true authentic life as the real you.

Take away tip:  Try these at home as  beginning mindfulness exercises.

1- Set a timer for one minute.  Close your eyes and listen, just listen and nothing else.  After the timer goes off write down every sound you heard, all noises big or small.

2- Set a timer for one minute.  Look around the room you are in, just look and nothing else.  After the timer goes off close your eyes and name verbally all the things you saw in the room and ask someone to them down for you.

3- Set a time for one minute.  Close your eyes and feel, just feel and nothing else.  Notice how your body feels inside, notice the feel of the floor on your feet, the seat you are sitting on, the air in the room, the sensation of breathing in and out.   After the timer goes off write down everything you felt.

Then take another moment or two to look, listen and feel and see if you are able to observe anything you missed the first time.  Start noticing what you hear, see and feel everywhere you go, it is interesting to take a notebook and write some observations down so you can compare the changes as you practice more.  Have fun with it.  We are here to experience so experience and really be present with the experience.  Don't label, don't judge.  It does not have to be good or bad, some things just are, just notice, be aware, be mindful and this is the start of the journey of MORE.

love and light

Jamie

Where to start

Happy day to you!

I am so glad you came back.  I cannot express how excited I am about our journey.  Where to start?  I have so many things that need to be touched on and shared that it is a bit overwhelming (in a great way) to decide where to begin.  This is a mental health blog for my therapy practice but it is so much more than that as well.  It is my living and breathing intention in progress.  My career as a mental health therapist has led me to places I never expected to be but so has my personal life and once again I am thrilled to combine the two.  The interests that I have developed in my life fit perfectly into my therapy practice which makes sense as it is the place I am destined to be and destined to share.

So, let's get an overview to start with.  In no particular order or rank the following topics draw me in and I find them perfect compliments to a full life and a holistic therapy practice.  They also will, at some point or another, be a topic here on my blog.  Mindfulness, yoga, meditation, essential oils for healing, chakras, positive energy and self talk, self care, teaching, body/mind/spirit techniques, the concept of holding trauma in our physical bodies and how to release that in order to heal.  More you ask?  Ok more- the necessity to let out your thoughts and feelings to avoid becomng toxic from the trauma and stress, setting intentions in life, connectedness to others, reading and numerous books I love and recommend, the importance of journaling, blogging or otherwise getting your thoughts in written form.  Yes, in fact there is more, facing and defeating our own personal demons with mindfulness and meditation, mindful recovery from addictions, mindful everything, creating programs for people who want to learn to meditate and be mindful and more but that is a good start!

It is my intention to take each topic and share, educate and help you to incorporate it into your life.  Please interact and comment, ask questions and get connected.  Take what resonates with you, share it and get others involved.  Let's spread the joy and love  I want to get to know you and I want you to get to know me.

Until I get more input I will start with mindfulness and meditation.  They are interconnected in so many ways.  I am obsessed with both concepts.  For me it is like the chicken and the egg; which came first?  For me it is hard to say.  The joyful part is that it doesn't matter because I have discovered them both.  Now discovering and using are two different things.  I want to teach and talk and discuss but most importantly give you all very tangible tips and ways to incorporate these into your daily life so that you discover the life changing impact that they have if you allow it.  Allowing is oh so important in life, stop the resistance and allow the joy.

Next blog post will start with a basic Q and A about what mindfulness is.  Please join me.

love and light

Jamie